Posts Tagged ‘extrovert’


An introverted black guy

November 11, 2012

If I had to classify myself as a certain type of person then an introvert would probably be the most fitting label. I thoroughly enjoy my peace and quiet, I love sitting in silence and thinking, pretty much anything that involves solitude I find some type of pleasure in.

As someone who enjoys his alone time, I really despise when people nag endlessly about how I NEED to get out and go to a club/bar/party/random social event etc. Now, if you’re the type of person enjoys always going out, partying, doing the robot on the dance floor (I actually enjoy doing the robot to), getting drunk, then more power to you, I won’t stop you from having your good time. But for me, that whole scene is just kind of eh, it doesn’t make either of us wrong or right for liking or disliking it, we’re just different.

Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate you looking out for my well being, I know your intentions are sincere, you just want me to go out and have a good time. But the thing is some of us in the world don’t really enjoy huge social interactions, they don’t stimulate us and therefore they aren’t enjoyable.

You might think this is crazy. or that it makes me a loner, or antisocial or whatever you’d like to call it. But I find quiet, peace and solitude just as fun as you find partying and social gatherings. Some will have you believe that if you enjoy staying to yourself then there’s something wrong, as if we all should be these wild social creatures, constantly breathing down each others throats. As stated before, if being extremely social is your thing then don’t let me get in your way, I just happen to find that I’m happiest when I’m not around a large group of others, it doesn’t make either of us right or wrong, we’re just different.

My social life operates usually in one of two ways. either a need to, or a pleasure basis. The need to basis is simple, if I have to talk to you to accomplish whatever it may be that I need to get done then we will have conversation.This includes things like me calling tech support because I have a repeated problem with breaking laptops, paying a bill over the phone, ordering food and things of that nature. Then we have the pleasure basis, which is where I choose to interact because I get some time enjoyment out of it. This includes joking with friends, talking with family, trying to tell a coworker why he needs to man up and talk to the cute cashier who works up front. It also includes one on one intimate conversations, not necessarily sexual, but those types of verbal exchanges when you really get to know someone and you can learn from them. For me, most large social events don’t evoke that pleasure, there’s no enjoyment, no fulfillment, just me in a large room standing in a corner, silently people watching as every one else enjoys the festivities.

So, the next time I decline your request to go out, I’m not avoiding you, or trying to be an ass. I’m probably inside somewhere quiet, with me, my music, my thoughts and a bowl of cereal, which is more than enough fun for me.