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Minilaptop facts of life

September 22, 2010

I’ve compiled a list of simple, but crucial facts of life that I have realized in my 21 years of living.

1. Everyone needs their own personal 80’s rock montage song.

2. Contrary to what you’ve been told, there are such things as stupid questions.

3. The first person to ever milk a cow was either very curious or a serious pervert. (But either way I appreciate their discovery.)

4. You know the answers to most of your life’s problems, it’s just a matter of you finding/accepting the truth and getting over the obstacle.

5. If you’ve been placed in the friend zone there is a 99.9% chance that you will never escape from it.

6. Mario is greatest video game character ever made in the history of life.

7. Aliens do exist, and we all at least know one.

8. Money doesn’t change you, it only brings out who you really are.

9. Chuck Norris could have easily fixed the BP oil spill.

10. Smacking a man is more demoralizing than punching him.

11. The fastest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.

12. Intelligence is the sexiest trait a woman could ever have.

13. There are four things that can unify large groups of people, regardless of political/religion/moral beliefs: Music, food, sports & tragedy.

14. Laughter really is good medicine for the soul.

15. If you are over six feet tall, then you are doing me and my fellow vertically challenged people a disservice.

16. Aquaman is the worst super hero ever created.

17. In five years the majority of major label record companies will be extinct.

18. We all like to feel appreciated.

19. I will have abs one day.

20. It’s past 3 o clock in the morning and I should really be getting some shut eye.

21. If you read this blog then you’re pretty awesome.

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16 comments

  1. #5 is oh so true.


    • I’ve been trying to find the blueprints to escape the friend zone, so far it’s not going too good.


  2. Loved this post! Laughed out loud, took many to heart and of course #21 was my fave!!


  3. bhahahaa oh mikey i luv ya buddy!
    love this list…i agree with all of them.


  4. I love this one!
    Many are true, quirky, funny, and honest. Definitely smiled as I read this one!

    2. HAHA EW! So true! Hmm I’m going to go squish up that hottie cow’s boobies, and then I’m gonna drink the white secretions….

    5. Very true. Being a girl myself, once a guy is in the friend zone, I won’t be interested anymore. Stay away!

    15. Hey, there are plenty of petite ladies (like myself) who make the “Vertically challenged” men look tall.

    18. I appreciate you

    21. well, ya.


    • 5. That friend zone kills me, it’s one of the few constants in my life lol.

      15. True, but don’t be intimidated, we’re here to protect you from the tall giants of the world.

      18. 🙂 likewise.


  5. 6. Super Mario…woo hoo!!! 🙂

    12. So true, although most men seem to overlook such a trait.

    14. I don’t think people laugh enough. So serious nowadays!! 😦

    15. Sorry…not my fault. (Not quite 6 ft, but close) And I must say…I wish I was a little bit SMALLER!!! 😉

    16. Superman is the GREATEST!!

    18. I APPRECIATE YOU AND YOUR BLOG!!

    21. Yes, I am, Thank You!! LoL


  6. I’m glad i’m appreciated 🙂

    As far as number 16, I’m gonna have to give batman the top nod. The batmobile is the best car on the market.


    • He’s not a Superhero, he’s just a human with cool gadgets! 😉 I’m just saying!!!


      • That’s why he’s the best, because he’s normal, except he has a super hero bank account lol.


  7. 12. Intelligence is the sexiest trait a woman could ever have.

    Well, I guess this is true. A big ass isn’t bad either. Haha.


    • Intelligence+Big booty=Epic combination.


  8. You copied me! Just kidding, but you have some very good picks. #14 and #18 are so true, I can’t believe I forgot them! I guess I still have a lot to learn 🙂


    • Your blog and random late night boredom were inspiration lol.


  9. #9 – totally true!


  10. Aquaman is the worst superhero character, but I do think the Wonder Twins should get a special place as well. I do love Mario so much, and any Mario with Yoshi is awesome.



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